The quandary of love and acceptance

The Boys

I have an issue with blubber, I think it is ugly, I don’t like to see it and it repulses me.  I do not attach any social commentary to the sight of blubber such as; Oh how sad, that person is so fat. He/she must really be lazy to be so fat.  It is really irresponsible for a person to let themselves get that fat.  I don’t stare at blubber in wonderment as I would a train wreck or space shuttle launch.  I see blubber and I turn my head; I don’t want to look at it.

Wonder Woman

I love who I am and I truly want the best for me. I believe I am special and I think I am extra ordinary.   I wake every morning and think of what I am going to do for me, fortunately I derive my greatest pleasure by caring for others. I love myself because it is better for those around me if I am at my best.

My repulsion of Blubber and my love of self is what create my greatest quandary.  My dilemma is in, my blubber.  How can I love and accept myself when every time I look in the mirror, I see the very thing that repulses me; blubber.   The last time I was in this predicament I went into a state of denial and refused to see me for who I had become and I ballooned to 152kg/334lb.  I remember those days well, my morning ritual was to look in the mirror and tell myself how good I looked.  In order to accept myself I refused to see the blubber and what I had done to myself.

 fine wine

I have written in previous post about my fateful day when I stripped down and took an honest look in the mirror and the repulsion I felt while I gazed at the blob of blubber that was me.  I loved myself but I could not accept what I had done to myself.  Repeat “I could no longer accept what I had done to myself” In my opinion this is the key to a healthy mental attitude towards changing the person I love and accept; me.

it's great to be a dad

I have done a considerable amount of reminiscing trying to pin point the timeline for when I became repulsed and embarrassed by blubber and in essence ashamed in myself.   When I was an adolescent around 8 or 9 yrs old, I was a tall and chubby boy.   I recall in the summer months I never wore a shirt, I was just a happy fat kid running and playing as hard as I could and that’s when I remember first being called jelly belly. At first, Jelly Belly had no effect on my humor until the name stuck and it became a taunt by others.  By the time I was 11 I was never seen without a shirt on, embarrassment also known as shame had taken hold in my spirit.  I was chubby and ashamed of my blubber and consequently ashamed of myself. 

Ya Baby, no shirt, no shame

I believe it is important to get back in touch with the happy, carefree, blubbery, child that I loved and accepted and this is what I am doing to make it happen.

·         Stop hiding from myself and others

o   Take off my shirt and never be ashamed of who I am or what I look like.

·         Be an adult for myself

o   There is a parent, adult and child within all of us, the child is who gets me fat the adult is who tells me to maintain and act responsibly.

·         Be honest with myself

o    The flab and blubber may never go away and it is most likely that I will never have the body of an Adonis. 

·         Be happy and have no regrets

o   I have made many poor decisions traveling the road that has lead me to where am, some were hurtful and painful and without them I would not be who I am.  Accept myself for being imperfect and be happy

You have to be strong to be a kid

Life is not meant to be a struggle. If you are not happy with what you have become, be courageous enough to change. If you are letting the past control today, embrace your inner adult and leave the past in the past. Love yourself, accept yourself and live life for yourself.

Party

Go have some fun,

Geo

young and happy

Geniet van het leven en het leven met een goede gezondheid

What Have you Done for Me Lately?

 Janet Jackson

The Monkeys

“That Was Then and This is Now” and “What Have you Done for Me lately” lyric that speak for your body.

I believe it is human nature to rest on our past accomplishments.   In a previous blog I wrote about the memory body.   The core message of that blog was that whatever we do today will be with us tomorrow.  The more we do today; to make ourselves stronger, smarter, and healthier the better we will be tomorrow.

same weight different body

Our body is demanding, our mind is a sponge, and our spirit is compelling.  Every physical movement, each cook book read, fitness video watched, personal wellbeing lesson learned, energizes us towards a long healthy, fit life. 

left is today rt is b4

It is okay to take a break and it is also important to keep feeding the body with new material.  I meet far too many people who tell me how much they enjoy riding bikes, playing sport, practicing yoga, or going to the gym who when queried realize they have not done any of these things in 20 yrs.  Time passes quickly and if we are not careful a decade will have flown by, before we know what happened. 

1998

The good news is, health and fitness is just like riding a bike; we never forget how to do the things we have done.  If riding bikes, doing yoga, going to the gym, or cooking healthy was something that gave us pleasure before it will bring comfort again; all we need to do is do it. 

1997

It is important to understand that the past is history; it is yesterday’s business and yesteryears memory. What has been done belongs where it is, an accomplishment.  What will be is how we choose to empower ourselves today.

Easy steps to health:

·         Take a walk:  whenever the urge to move hits you get up and take a walk, even if it is to the kitchen for a glass of water or piece of fruit.  Getting up and out is positive motion in action.

·         Study an online course:  the mind thrives on being challenged and fed.  An online course of any kind will prime the pump and lead to positive healthy action.

·         Go to the park:  A stroll though the park will rekindle memories of childhood play and activities.

·         Say yes:  When the impulse to ride a bike, roller blade, and ice skate or shoot hoops arises, look for ways to make it happen rather than reasons why you cannot.

·         Be Fearless:  It is normal to be afraid of failure and change.  Embrace emotional fear and turn it into excitement.

·         Spice up your life:  Change is the spice of life, break away from routine and do new things. Taste new foods, travel new roads, join new groups; change is positive and promotes growth.

Being and getting healthy and fit is not brain surgery, I believe every adult has been given the information to make the intelligent decisions required to be healthy.  A healthy life style is a personal choice.   Choice is our most powerful weapon in the quest to live a sane healthy life.  We have the right to choose the way we want to live.  Life is a perception; one person may see doom and gloom while another will see opportunity.   Some wake up happy and ready for the excitement each new dawn brings while others greet each morning with a frown.  Joy is not found in what we have it is in how we hold it.

Go have some fun,

Geo

Njut livet och var glad.            

Turn on the Heat

getting some fresh air

I lived in Northern California for nearly 20 yrs, night time during the winter months meant the tempreatures would drop to just above freezing with a wet bitter chill that would set deep into my bones.  My homes heat came from wood and that’s when I learned about wood burning stoves and the purpose of different types of timber for example,  pine is good for starting fires, it burns fast and hot, walnut smells good and puts off strong heat and oak burns slow and hot and is good for overnight use.  The one thing I remember most about the warmth from wood is it's ability to cut the chill and the incredible relief my bones felt from it.   For me there is no better feeling than heat penetrating my body all the way to its core. 

Oh ya thats what I'm talking about

I have lived in the tropics for the last 16 years where the highs reach 45C/113F and rarely falls below 25C/77F.  These tropical temperatures are not warm enough to satisfy my bodies conditioned needs and cravings for extremely high heat consequently I am never far from a steam room or sauna. 

Many people think of the sauna as only a place to sweat and don’t understand my desire to feel the heat.   I view sweating as a process of cleaning and opening my pores and a way to help reduce the amount of rubbish my liver is required to filter. 

I know I am in the right place, when I open the door to the sauna and I feel a blast of heat hit me in the face that is hot enough to bake pottery or glaze glass.  When I feel high heat coming from a sauna it makes me smile.  I know it is almost crazy to sit in these tyes of high temps and almost impossible to last for more than 15 minutes but I am drawn to the heat like a bee to nectar. Before I enter the sauna, I take a deep breath then I lower my head and step into the room.  I am quick to sit because it is cooler then standing and i wait; soon the drip will begin. The number one reason I like using a sauna is because of what occurs in the first 15 minutes of waiting for my body to protest; my mind trends to kick into a creative gear.  The furnace seems to clear my mind and creates cherished moments of clarity. 

Put the fork in I'm baked.

Heat melts my tension, warms my soul and limbers my muscles, gives me great relief from nagging joint pain and stimulates me to move.  Sometimes I day dream; close my eyes,  feel the heat and imagine a clear blue sky with a big bright sun shining down on me while I sit on a white sand beach, sipping a coconut cocktail, listening to the subtle roar of waves rolling to shore with a gentle sea breeze that keeps me cool.  Extreme heat allows me to take trips without ever leaving home. 

I start and finish every training session with a sauna, first to melt tension, stretch and clean my body of impurities and later to stretch and melt any tension the training may have created.  



My dream spot

 Heat creates movement, it is a scientific fact that heat rises.  If your muscles are feeling tight or your mind is causing you to be uptight turn on the heat and let all your tensions and frustrations float away.  Heat is good and heat propels us to new levels.  Get hot, break a sweat and remember the best way to fade heat, is to jump right in it. 

Go have some fun,

Geo.

desfrutar a vida com boa saúde  

Coconuts are my role model

almost ready for harvest

The other day my two sons and I were returning home from an outing when the youngest proclaimed: “I have nothing to play with”.  The oldest boy and I looked at each other and laughed in amazement and confusion because I don’t think either of us know a kid who has, as many toys, games, balls, bikes, animals, musical instruments, puzzles, DVD, and computer toys, and junk as Phoenix.   I realized it was just his way of saying: “I am bored” so rather than go into a tangent of listing all the things he has, I asked if he would guess: what his brother Popee had to play with when he was a youngster?  When Popee was growing up, he loved playing with coconuts. He would kick them like footballs, run with them, throw, paint and talk to them.  Popee loved his coconuts and I was very happy that he did.

A gift that keeps giving

 The Balinese are excellent at getting everything there is to get from the fruit.  I never realized how versatile it is until I watched them work with it.  Between cooking, carving, eating, drinking, burning and replanting, I don’t think there is any part of it that goes to waste. 

The coconut is versatile.

1.       When the fruit is green its bounty is nectar, and meat   

2.       The husk can be dried and used for seasoning on the BBQ

3.        The burned husk can now be recycled into BBQ charcoal

4.       The hard shell is dried, cut, polished and used for handcrafts, cooking tools, and utensils  

5.       The meat is shredded and squeezed

6.       1^st press coconut cream

7.       2^nd pressed coconut milk

8.       If not cooked for oil the shred will be eaten

9.       Slow cooked shred for oil

10.   Toy for children and adults

Green, Ripe, Creamed, Milked, Aged, Oiled and Burned.

I was on the tread mill and feeling like the tin man; stiff and in need of lubricating.  This made me reflect on days gone by when I was very green; when I could do anything, jump from tall places, run from morning to night, never tire or hurt.  As teen, I was still green but big, fresh and full of energetic juices ready to be tapped.  In my twenties the Seasons and years of nurturing came together and I reached maturity; physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and financially.  In my thirties I began milking, refining, and processing all that I had become and in my 50’s I am on my 4^th press and still milking whatever creative and productive juices I have in me.  I am planning on another 45 yrs of milking my shred before I am oiled and turned to soil.

Its inspiring to see folks starting new careers after their kids have grown and watching others who have retired after 30yr careers, departing on new journeys such as living on sail boats and going in whatever direction the wind blows.  Many look at these types of people with skepticism and think they are nuts.  I call them coconuts; versatile, durable and sustainable to the very end.

 I want to be a coconut when I grow up.

just do it

 Go have some fun,

Geo

vivre joyeusement et en bonne santé

Dreams

Graduation day from Professional Thai Cooking course. 

Dreams are reality waiting to materialize.

I think it was Will Rogers who said: “You can be on the right track but if you don’t keep movin the train will run you over.”   The New Year is here and this is when the blogs are about setting resolutions and making goals.   Last year marked the end and of one and the beginning of another decade.  I have been using a 10 yr planner the last 30 years.  They work and it is truly amazing what happens when we allow ourselves to dream.

three monkeys

The Hot 100 list.  Making a list of goals is not always as easy as making a club sandwich but in some ways it is very similar.  A club sandwich has 5 basic ingredients; bread, meat, poultry, dairy, and vegetable.  Goals come from 5 basic areas of life; spiritual, emotional, mental, physical, and financial. 

Dream Big

My Wife has not been able to put her list together and it has now been 13 months.  My son age 13 has not been able to make his list either.  I did mine on Jan 1, 2011 in less than 60 minutes.  Why?  Why is it easy for one person and not for others?

Three common reasons people don’t set goals:

1.       Fear: typically fear of failure is the root cause of failing to make goals.  Fear comes from not understanding that there is no such thing as failure when it comes to making a want list.

2.       Embarrassment:  Unfortunately we are conditioned to see reality from other people’s perspective, consequently when we find that our wants are different from our friends and family we are embarrassed and we begin to doubt our reality.

3.       Lack of Faith:  The ultimate effect of fear, embarrassment and doubt is a lack of faith in our own dreams and aspirations.

 Golden Rules to Making Hot 100 list:

·         Confidentiality:  the list is your list, it is not a term paper that needs to be graded or approved by anyone other than you;  it is a private document that is for your eyes only.

·         Mix it Up:  Goals are meant to attainable and dreams are meant to come true, think big, think impossible and think tomorrow.

·         Be, See, Do:   Use the five area of life as a guide and ask yourself what you want to be, see and do Physically, Emotionally, Mentally, Spiritually and Financially.

·         Faith:   It takes a great deal of courage to dream big dreams.  Faith gives us the power to face the unknown, knock down the self imposed barriers that stand in our way and create our own reality.  

I asked my wife why it was so hard for her to make the list and she said she had everything she wants.  She was visibly frustrated by her inability to complete the task and she knew her answer was not true but she simply does not know how to make a wish list.

Papa I want a pony

One way to get started:  Where do I want to go? What do I want to have?  What do I want to do?   Write what ever come to mind, this is a private wish list, be honest, and let the truth come out.  If I was guaranteed success what would I do, see and be?  Make the list, start with the simple and then reach a bit and assume the best and finally dream big dreams, think the unthinkable and keep working until you have your hot 100.

Doing business in NYC

It is 2012 and I am purging my 10 year hot 100 list of the things that I accomplished in 2011 and replacing them with new dreams and aspirations that I want to accomplish within the next 9 yrs. I will continue this count down until 2021; I will be 64 yrs old, fit, healthy and a fat man in paradise.

At the end of the day we are all part of a plan.  The question is; do we want to control our own destiny or be a cog in someone else’s plan? 

Foods On!

Go have some fun,

Geo

 lenjoy здоровой долгой жизни

The memory Body

puppies

My sons were given three 8 day old puppies.  The animals were far too young to be taken away from their mother but she had no milk and was rejecting them.  The first thing we did when the pups arrived was make a soft, warm bed for them.  Today the two surviving puppies are 18 weeks old and have chosen a sofa as their night time bed.  My wife is not happy with the animal’s choice.  I explained to her that they prefer a soft, warm, cushion; the same as we provided when they first arrived to the cold hard tile we are now offering them.

my puppies

Five bodies in perpetual motion:

1.       Physical

The Vessel we see when we look in the mirror

2.       Emotional

The feelings that lead us into action

3.       Spiritual

The element that gives us peace, guidance and serenity

4.       Energetic

The Aura of light that encircles our physical being

                                    

5.       Memory

The Molds of life, cast through life experience.

These five essentials can also be considered five elements of life, if the lights not shining we are not breathing and nothing else matters. All five bodies interact with one another and are intricate parts of what makes us who we are.

The memory body is like a foot print in the sand, it is a mold that is formed and cast with every effort and lives deep within our psychic.  Many times it is the subconscious memories that propel us to behave the way we do.  Our past is always with us, and everything we do today will be tomorrows memory of yesterday, the key is to fill the memory body with more positive actions and results than negatives.

Ready to start making history

 I am writing about this because I returned to the gym after an extended lay off.   I resumed my training on the free weights with great caution and for ten days I did a routine of cross cardio and upper body lifts. I was resting my legs because I had tweaked one of my knees while I was traveling and it was giving me pain.

As I have stated before I believe if we listen to our bodies we will be lead through a good physical training routine.  After each session I would feel stronger and buffed and my muscles were popping (pumped.) I kept having the impulse to work my legs but I over road the craving. I was confused and upset because I was doing everything I could think of to relieve stress to the knees; I was wearing braces, using a sauna and having massage therapy yet both knees felt very unstable and were in nagging pain. 

As it turned out, the craving was my body asking for more. My body had used pain, impulse and cravings to communicate; work the legs but I resisted.  On this day I went to the machines and did a full conditioning on my knees, and legs.  I started very slow, with almost no weight resistance and by the end of the 90 minutes session I was extending and curling 2/3 of the weight on the rack.

looking back is not all bad

 

The Memory and Physical body lead me to recovery.  When I left the gym that day I was walking without braces for the first time in 3 weeks and my legs felt stronger then they had in more than two months. 

old gams

Trust your voices, listen to your body and when you find yourself resisting good advice ask yourself why.  The things that made you feel good and great are still within you. That which is great is you and yours to own. I suggest we live like puppies and let our memory body lead us to peace, joy and happiness.

Go have some fun,

Geo 

Ja ist es alle gute

  

When is it time to reassess?

Pure sugar baby, pure sugar!

One definition of insanity: doing the same thing the same way and expecting different results.

In my opinion the complication in tracking weight loss is found when I am not able to do the same things the same way for an extended period of time and then when I am doing the same things the same way and producing different results. 

My body and the way it functions never fails to amaze and confuse me.  I have been on a low fat high protein meal plan for six months however during this time I have not been able to put a full uninterrupted 30 days of consistent behavior together.

During the last half year I have continued to see positive and negative change.  With each set back I have assumed it was due to the interruption in gym time.   One critical observation about this new program was,  the fact that weight never came off with the same consistency as prior to the high protein meal plan; some weeks 200 grams and other weeks as much as 3kg.  Mentally, I could accept the inconsistency as long as the drops continued even if it there was yo-yoing along the way. 

Measuring my 15 body points every month showed an overall reduction in size or a push 95% of the time. This added to my confusion regarding weight gain; was it increased muscle mass or fat? 

 I had my doubts and considered changing my food to a more vegetarian style menu but I continued with my high protein meals and time passed.  This week I did my weigh in and I was up 2.5kg a more bothersome number than a push but not as worrisome as the realization that I have been yo-yoing for the last 6 months.  I am not dropping weight and keeping it off.

Home gym

My program has made me insane; I have been doing the same things the same way and been expecting different results!  It is time to reassess my routine and meal plan.

When I re-examine a work in progress I look at the hard facts broken into average total minutes spent in the gym and my food intake:

·         per month

·         per week

·         per day

·         Total weight dropped per month.

Gym time

Since June, I averaged 2,348 minutes of gym time per month, 542 minutes per week, and 77 minutes per day.  Keep in mind this includes the time I spent traveling in the USA and other road trips.  IMO one hour per day of gym time is a reasonable target number that anyone should be able to fit into their daily schedule and fitness routine.  One hour per day has proven to be an ideal weight maintenance number. 

 Time in the gym is directly related to my weight control, in June and July I averaged 99 minutes per day of gym time and dropped 7kg/15.4lb, while in October and November I averaged 55minutes per day and gained 6kg/13.2lb.

Food Intake for the past six months: 1,782 calories per day (<813>) BMR 2,595

                                                                                Target

·         Carbohydrates  47%         Carbohydrates  45%,  

·         Proteins            25%          Proteins            30%,  

·         Fat                    28%          Fats                    25%

During October I visited the Pritikins wellness centre in Florida and was given a Pritikin Eating Plan.   This is a rough outline of the system:

Eat

·         5 servings of unrefined complex carbohydrates per day

·         5 vegetable per day

·         4 fruits per day minimum

·         2 calcium rich foods per day

·         1 animal protein per day Maximum

·         1 to 2 tables spoons of fresh herbs daily

In Moderation

·         1 to 2 egg whites per day

·         Artificial sweeteners 3 to 6 packets per day

·         3 cups of caffeinated drinks per day maximum

Not Recommended

·         Alcoholic beverages

·         Refined or Concentrated sweeteners

·         Salt and high-sodium foods and condiments

·         Refined grains

Avoid

·         Animal fats, tropical oil, and processed refined oil

·         Meats

·         Whole and low-fat dairy

·         Coconuts

·         Potassium chloride

·         Egg yolk, deep fried foods, non dairy whipped toppings, rich desserts and pastries and salty snack foods.

This list may need a bit of explaining, use Google search engine if you are not sure about something the information is there to be found. 

I can see my current program has been relying too much on burning calories and not enough on smart food choices.  My issue is not in how much I eat but what I am eating.  This new  adjustment to the Pritikin like plan should prove interesting and I am looking forward to reporting the positive results, stay tuned for the updates.

Go have some fun,

Geo